Things You Missed In The NBA While You Were Opening Presents, Forced To Spend Time With Your Family And Drinking For No Reason

nba christmas

Derrick Rose has no knees and Steve Nash is basically a zombie. Christmas is going to be awesome!

Happy Holidays and Happy 2014, everyone.  The holidays are different now, huh?  It seems   like we are spending more and receiving less as the years go on.  The good thing about the NBA is that it’s the gift that keeps on giving.  Except this year.  It didn’t give us much this year.  Here’s what you missed because you were drunk, you guys.

1)  The Annual “I’m going to start drinking now” Game of Christmas was played by the Bulls and the Nets:

Don’t worry, nothing weird happened.  The Nets lost, Jason Kidd looked confused and the Bulls looked depressed in a subtle, yet fake-excited way that ultimately made them look more depressed.

2)  LeBron kept dunking on the Lakers:

3)  The NBA waited for everyone to be drunk/exhausted before playing the Clippers-Warriors game:

christmas day games

So yeah, I didn’t watch this one, but it looks like Blake Griffin lost his 18th consecutive fight with a big man.  Plus, it’s been clear for many years that Bogut is certainly NOT the one to step to.

4)  Russell Westbrook Sneaky Got Hurt

westbrook injury

This one’s a bummer.  After being an iron-man for his entire basketball career, Westbrook is having his third knee procedure within the last 9 months.  You never know with knees.  I’m not buying the “minor” knee injury talk and expect OKC to hold Westbrook out until well after the All-Star break.

5)  Andrew Bynum Got Suspended For “Conduct”, But It Probably Wasn’t Because He Had Sex With His Assistant Coach’s Wife

Dude probably overslept or something.  Definitely had nothing to do with cuckolding and assistant coaches.  Nothing to make of things like this:

cavs removal

6) The Boston Celtics are putting Rajon Rondo in the D-League Because Basketball is Just Like Baseball 

twitter status

A and let him warm that shoulder up.  Team chemistry and developing a comfort level are SO overrated.

7) Tony Parker Accidentally Posed In a Picture Throwing Up An Anti-Semitic Symbol

tony parker

I’m not an expert on offensive symbolism, but if he did it, this was no accident.  Or he’s trying to dap up the camera man and didn’t know a picture was being taken.  Could really be an honest mistake.

8)  The Knicks, Man

knicks man


That’s it.  You’re caught up.  You’re welcome.


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